Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Happily Ever After?

We live in a culture that is infatuated with Happily Ever After. I remember dreamily watching Snow White, Cinderella, Sleeping Beauty and many other movies wishing for my prince charming. I feel sorry for men today! What kind of expectations have we made them have to live up to? According to the story line they are to be handsome, charming, know our every need and sweep us off our feet. No wonder there is so much disrespect for the male of our species! They can’t get a break. Now don’t get me wrong even though I claim to not be a mushy girlie movie watcher I still end up watching Lifetime Movie Network or Hallmark with tissues. They are great stories but they are fiction! Men are fallible just as we are. Do not try to make your husband to be perfect. That will lead to you disrespecting him, maybe even demeaning him.

We need a reality check. The only perfect man the ever has been, was, is and will ever be is Jesus. Period. If you are looking for your spouse to be that then you will be let down and they will be crushed with the responsibility of unrealistic expectations. When was the last time you thanked him for his work? His fathering? His love-making? His just being there? For choosing you? Has he made mistakes? Have you? Think about it this way, his parents were not perfect so he is just doing the best he can with what he learned from growing up.

I guess I am writing this because I have seen too many divorces recently. I have seen too many wives disrespecting their husbands behind their backs, with their children present, and even to their faces. I have seen too many wives say that they want to leave their mate even though they have promised to love for better or worse, for richer or poorer! My heart aches. That doesn’t mean that I am immune. There have been times that I have talked bad about my husband to my friends and to my family. I have learned that all that does is feed the monster of discontent. Your family & friends will only encourage you to leave if they think you will be happier but what does God say?

1 Corinthians 13:4-8a 4Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. 8Love never fails.

Matthew 5:43-44 43"You have heard that it was said, 'Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.' 44But I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.

So if love is all these things and we are supposed to even love our enemies shouldn’t we love our spouses too? Love is not a feeling. If it were then every marriage would end in divorce very quickly. Marriage is not a walk in the park. When we said our vows our eyes were glazed over with the romance of it all. Once life hits you a choice has to be made. Am I going to choose to love? Love is a choice. Love is an action. Jesus demonstrated that by an action. He died for us. How are you willing to demonstrate it to your husband? Show him that you love him!

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